July 29, 2013
Filed In: Marriage
On your Wedding Day, you promise to take care of your wife, in sickness and in health.
That’s kinda cute. We think that means buying her soup and putting a cool cloth on her forehead. Boom, vow fulfilled. Check that box and we’re moving on!
But wait! Is that what we’re actually promising to do?
When your wife is sick, and I mean seriously ill, you have to do more than just take care of her. All of the responsibilities of the household fall to you. Suddenly, you’re the only one cooking and cleaning. You’re the only one shuttling your kids around and you’re sure as heck the only one doing all of the shopping (with a kid or two in tow).
On top of that, your wife is not able to show her love for you in ways that she would like. That will be little cuddling. She won’t be able to perform any acts of service. You will be constantly miserable because she feels miserable and there is nothing you can do to change it.
You start to feel lonely.
What we fail to consider is how radically our lives change when our spouse is ill.
Bottom line: we take our good health for granted.
As the illness drags on, the stress and pressure start to get to you. You may even start to blame her for it or become resentful. After all, you’re picking up her responsibilities! You are literally living in the land of temptation.
When the day comes, how will you respond?
If marriage was simply friendship, you would just walk away. Sadly, we have heard stories of spouses stricken with cancer and, after a time, the husband runs off with another woman. How can this be? The marriage was seen as convenient. It served it’s purpose for a time, but when things got tough, it was time to exit.
This is why it is so important to build your marriage on unconditional (to the degree that you can) love. Your marriage should be 100% about your wife and her well being. To your wife, your marriage should be 100% about you and your well being. It is only through this mutual love that your marriage can survive.
When you are 20, 25, or 30, you cannot foresee what your wife will be like at age 80 or 90. If you build your marriage on physical attraction, you’re going to have a hard time even 10 years down the road. If you build it on love, you’ll be able to transcend all of life’s challenges.
There will be hard times in your marriage. There will be serious illness and you will have to carry the household. Prepare for those days by loving your wife well today.
Do you pray for the health of your spouse daily? Maybe today is a good day to start.