Catholic Husband

Love / Lead / Serve

Be Full of Surprises

A few days before Valentine's Day, my sister texted me asking what my plans were. "Are you going to write Alison a love letter and draw her a bath?" Of course, I responded yes. I also noted how hard it is to surprise Alison because I give away my best ideas on the blog and she edits every single one of them!

Surprises add a nice flair to life. A little pick-me-up or a gentle reminder of one's love and affection can make a big impact on someone's day. More than that, it keeps things fresh. By not following the script that's been written, an element of excitement and newness fills the air. If you're not surprising your wife on a regular basis, in ways big and small, you're not trying.

Marriage is built on and fueled by sweat equity. When you put in a lot of sweat, your marriage benefits. When you slack off, your marriage stagnates. It all goes back to the principles of physics: an object in motion tends to stay in motion and an object at rest tends to stay at rest. Being full of surprises takes innovation and effort. It takes thoughtfulness and creativity. Not only is it fun for your wife to be on the receiving end of these surprises, but it's fun for you. The fun comes from your ability to do something entirely new without her suspecting a thing. The fun comes when you see the look of shock on your wife's face when you've broken down another preconceived notion that she has of you. You're an amazing man with many talents. Show her.

Surprises are the perfect expression of love. They take prior planning, an element of positive secrecy and commitment. When you take the time out of your life to plan and execute on a surprise, you're telling your wife just how much she means to you. It's a bright spot in her day. You took your precious time and resources and spent them on her. That's a big deal!

Surprises should be unexpected, but not infrequent. The nature of surprises has little to do with time and everything to do with variety. You could surprise your wife with flowers on Monday, a clean house on Tuesday, and a candlelit dinner on Wednesday. She could be surprised each day because each instance is a different way of being surprised. Think outside the box! What is a totally new, inventive, and amazing way to surprise your wife? Hot air ballon ride? Handcrafted spice rack? Salsa dancing? Mix it up and do it often.

Surprise is the spice of life. While there are plenty of great ways to keep your marriage alive and strong, few things are more effective than surprises. Add some adventure and thrill to your wife's life by incorporating a habit of surprising her into your life.