The Genius of Mass
Most Catholics ignore their obligation to go to Sunday Mass. Their reasons are myriad, but it’s a big mistake. Sunday Mass represents the most brilliant and disruptive hour of the entire week.
For 167 hours every week, we have ceaseless demands on our time. We have to menu plan, grocery shop, clean the house, do the laundry, drive the kids around, update the budget, answer email, work, wash the cars, mow the lawn, walk the dog, pick up the house, clean up messes, shop for clothes, open packages, order supplies, and so much more.
For one hour a week, we have to do none of that. We don’t have to worry about the report that’s due, the sink overflowing with dishes, or the cars that we haven’t waxed in nine months. It’s the one protected hour when we can finally rest.
This is a glimpse into the Heavenly reward that awaits the diligent among us; a total absence of busyness. Calm, stillness, peace. This is the genius of Mass, a weekly reminder that we don’t have to toil forever. Something much better awaits us.
Inconvenience
The kids went on vacation earlier this summer without Alison and I. Grandparents Camp is a nice annual tradition for any child. We realized that an additional sleep machine would be needed, so at 1:34pm on a Saturday afternoon, I ordered one on Amazon. A 4:36am the next morning, Sunday morning, it was delivered. That’s stunning convenience.
It’s easy to get frustrated with the little inconveniences that we suffer throughout the day. The slow driver in the left lane, running out of our favorite coffee, the essential but unavailable items in our online grocery order. We have enough stressors in our lives to have to suffer these smaller, but still painful setbacks.
But what if we instead embraced the inconvenience? The slow driver is adding another two minutes to our trip. So what? We could replace the coffee with something else, or drive to a café and pick one up. Missing a key ingredient may be a way to spark some creativity in the kitchen.
When we let inconvenience loom large in our minds, we miss an opportunity to sharpen ourselves. We let a tiny detail derail our whole day. We welcome defeat without the least bit of resistance. Inconveniences happen; we choose our response.
Bottomless Tasks
I start every Monday with a fresh set of hours to work, and a full task list. As the week progresses, more and more tasks are added and a few get checked off. My task list will never be empty, and the sooner I accept that reality, the better.
Although most of us work in the knowledge economy, our labor is a production line. Things are completed, new things are added. There is no end until you change jobs or retire. That’s a good thing in that it ensures our economic viability. It’s a bad thing when we act like just one more hour will get us to where we need to be.
Life is impermanent, always ebbing and flowing. By definition, you’ll always be ahead of your work or behind it. Adding more hours to your schedule will get more done, but is unlikely to have an overall meaningful impact.
The best way to ensure your productivity and success at work is to take care of yourself. Don’t sacrifice exercise or family time for work; it won’t pay off. Don’t let laziness steal work time away from you, you can’t get it back. Accept that your task list will remain full, be grateful for the blessings of work, and do your best when the clock is running. Then, when work time expires, leave the rest. It’ll be there when it’s time to clock in again.
Disrupt
Wall Street is obsessed with disruptors; those companies that take a stale industry and deploy an entirely new approach, dislodging the entrenched powers. We’ve seen it time and again is business, sports, and wars when a dark horse comes out of nowhere, changes the game, and beats the unbeatable opponent.
There’s a reason why disruption is such a useful tool: it works. We all work ourselves into ruts. Whether for good or evil, disruption breaks the cycle.
Personal change and improvement is always possible, and seldom easy. We have to fight against our biology, which tends towards the comfort of the known. We also have to fight our psychology and all the negative soundtracks that keep us from becoming the best versions of ourselves.
To grow as a person, as a spouse, as a parent, and as a Catholic, we must continuously disrupt the lifestyle choices that hold us back. It’s a well-worn concept, one that St. Francis took to fanatical levels. It’s what Pope Francis meant when he instructed us to go out into the world and make a mess!
We share the same string of defeats. Goals unfulfilled, plans that fell apart. Goals and planning are the maps to our destination, but before we can take the first step, we have to commit with our minds and our hearts. External factors can inspire us, but when your alarm goes off at 5:00am, and it’s time to work out and pray, no one can do it for you. You can be inspired to be a more loving spouse, but only you can make that happen.
When we have the fortitude and grit to disrupt our lives, we can begin to live in the world of the possible. We don’t have to stay stuck or stay bored, we do have to dig deep, practice patience, and become comfortable with the uncomfortable.
Limitless
There are certain things in life that we pick up and just can’t seem to put down. Rules, guidelines, suggestions, and ideas that we carry with us and that color our world. We begin our lives knowing nothing, and over the first few decades we soak up the world, slowly losing our curiosity and settling into a mental rigidity.
So much of life is a war with ourselves. We have to fight off inertia, laziness, fear, anxiety, and overcompensation. Our battles are fought in our minds, as we seek to maintain mastery and control of ourselves and our lives. This war is not a bad thing; it’s the reason God gave humanity the power of intellect. He wanted us to fight, to contend, and to reap the growth and benefits of winning. Only then could we be truly free, able to create and bring beauty into the world.
Rigidity is one of our natural defenses. We stick to what we know and feel a sense of safety. But it can also lead us to a life of mediocrity. When we feel stuck, it’s time to call an audible.
Let go of the false messages that you tell yourself. Be bold enough to break out of your element and experience the serendipity of newness. Reengage the spark of curiosity of your younger self. Climb higher summits, explore new horizons, dream of new possibilities. Why let your life be limited?
Fifty-Four
I recently finished reading Atomic Habits, the pop culture phenom beloved by productivity hackers in every industry. The premise of the book is simple: success or failure is built in the tiny, every day actions that we repeatedly take. If we string together a series of positive actions, we’ll see a bigger net result. The opposite is true for negative habits.
Cultivating a rich prayer life is the struggle of a lifetime for every Catholic. As broad and diverse as the life of the Church is, our common challenge is overcoming the tedium of daily prayer. There are plenty of resources that allow for great variety, but at the end of the day, you have to set aside time for prayer, and then you actually have to do it.
The Rosary is undoubtedly a powerful meditation, with benefits both spiritual and physical. Stopping in the middle of the day for a 15-minute break of silence and peace can recharge your batteries, refocus your mind, and propel you through the rest of the day. It’s a good suggestion, but it’s not required, and the vast majority of us don’t do it.
I just finished a 54-day streak of praying the Rosary every day. It was not easy, I had to plan my prayer time, and I had to stick to it. But I was successful because, as James Clear wrote in the Atomic Habits book, I had the stamina to show up every day and work through the boredom.
So much of the battle for our souls happens in the context of our fidelity to prayer, of our submission to the reality that we cannot make it through life spiritually weak. If we want to build a strong habit of prayer, we have to commit and sustain our good works, especially on days when it’s not easy.
Restart
From time to time, we get derailed by life and need a reset. Although we may daydream about grandiose plans that will restore us to our former glory, years of broken plans and commitments reveal a simple truth.
The best way to succeed in any plan, program, or life change agenda is to start small, and start today.
Trust
In the most difficult and stressful times of our lives, it’s easy to lose control of our thoughts. The Paleolithic parts of our brains take over, blocking out the logical thinking that has enabled every positive advancement in our lives.
Although our biology fights against our reason, we have at hand many bits of wisdom, sprinkled throughout the Bible. These lines, written thousands of years ago, feel as if they were written just for us. As we stop the spiral, take a deep breath, and regain control, clarity sets in. Our struggles are an invitation to deeper trust in the providence of God that never fails us.
We all have prayers to which the answer is a resounding, “No.” Disappointed as we may be, in time, the things that we asked for are forgotten. It’s prayers that were answered, and the gifts granted to us that are beyond our limited imaginations that matter. Taking a wider view, we see the waypoints, decisions, and impacts in our lives stringing together in a way more beautiful and perfect than we ever could’ve designed.
Troubles will always be with us, but the deeper we trust in God’s will, and His plan for our lives, the more peace we invite into our lives. We don’t have to rely on ourselves, we don’t have to control every factor of our lives; we only have to go where we are called and serve.
Oh why do I worry? Why do I not trust you? Oh child, why hurry? When you have a Father who provides and never withholds His whole heart! Oh, God alone never changes; oh, God alone suffices; and God alone remains faithful.
Free
It’s hard to not be grateful when we realize the blessing of being born into this country. For all of its faults, we’ve built a Republic that thrives on pluralism. In South America, poverty, gang warfare, and narcoterrorism rule the day. In Europe, a land war rages on. In Asia, autocrats squeeze out dissent at home and abroad. Slavery, violence, oppression and subjugation are themes of human history, and the continue today unabated. And yet, in North America, we are at peace.
The stability and prosperity of our nation is a blessing, and one that we should not disparage. Our freedoms allow us to work, associate, play, and pray as we so choose. It’s a freedom that few other humans, outside the ruling class, have experienced.
We should fight furiously to preserve them and enter each day with a sense of profound gratitude to our Creator.
More
Our sense of timing is incredible. Consider the level of comfort that we experience daily, with technologies and services that our predecessors could never have imagined. You might even be reading this article on a computer that fits into your pocket.
Although we have many vices, through the benefit of history books and the Bible, we can see that these vices have always existed. The prophet Jeremiah wrote about troubles all around him, and the troubles are still with us. Hatred, violence, and injustice are threads that weave throughout the story of humanity.
Raising young children is a master class in human psychology. They come into the world possessing nothing, and as they grow, they seek to build their collection. My children literally beg me to keep trash for their use, whether it be empty bottles or used shipping boxes. They seek more. We’re the same as adults.
The desire for more can easily run us into a ditch. Overspending, overconsumption, and overworking are all a grasping for more.
The real problem is that we’re reaching for the wrong “more.” We seek a net increase in the quantity of our possessions and social stature. We should instead be investing our energy into a life of the good mores.
More virtue, more contentment, more prayer, more passion, more freedom, more dedication, more fidelity, more wellness, more connection, more relationships, more thoughtfulness, more mindfulness; these are the mores worth pursing.
Lulled into comfort, gorged on food and possessions, we trend toward a life of less. This was not the life that God planned for us. He wants the very best for us, but we can only attain that if we align our thoughts, habits, and activities towards gaining the right kind of more.