Catholic Husband

These Better Things

Mon, 09 Mar 2026 07:00:00 -0400

The relationship between Creator and created bends the mind. For centuries, theologians and philosophy have plumbed the depths of the reality of God. A Creator who is both perfect in and of Himself, but still chooses to enter relationship with the broken created. Not because they will make Him better or more perfect, but because of the reality of love means that we do for others with no expectation of reciprocity. He engages because His love for us means He wills the best for us.

So many of our plans, designs, and ideas are about elevating ourselves and our lifestyle. It’s the height of responsibility and maturity to build a stable household in which our children can grow, thrive, and launch. But when we compare our plans to those of God’s, we are instantly put in our place. It’s not that we cannot conceive or perceive the good, it’s because our creative and imaginative capacity is dwarfed by the capacity of Love in wanting the very best for us.

There are difficult days in life, and though they could not possible compare to the hardships that Catholics face around the world, or that Jesus endured in His penultimate act of self-giving, they are a challenge to bear nonetheless. We yearn for stability, clarity, and certainty, but when the losses stack up day after day, week upon week, and year after year, it’s an act of moral courage to continue to choose hope and trust.

The wages for hope and trust, for working as if it all depends on us, but trusting because it all depends on God, is a glimpse into the perfection of His design. A series of broken experiences, bad relationships, and difficult employment, in hindsight, are the perfect sequence that unlocks the vocation you were made to live. Regret and pain suddenly are anestized, as they are seen for what they were: specific preparation for the grace and mission to which we are called.

God is at work at every place, and in every moment. Though we may not choose the uncomfortable and downright terrifying experiences that we must undergo, they each slot into place in God’s plan. Not a minute was wasted, not a moment of discomfort was for naught; He makes all things new.

Trust is an easy word to speak, but a daily challenge to endure. He offers us a shared yoke, a place of rest; but to offer our yes to His generosity and His plans, we have to be willing to let go of our own smaller plans. It is the grandest bargain any of us are offered, and the last stumbling block to overcome before we get a foretaste of the greatness for which we were made.

Long Lens

Mon, 02 Mar 2026 08:00:00 -0400

It’s cliché to write about how short-fused we’ve become. In the golden age of comfort, where snacks are delivered to us by strangers or drones at the press of a glass rectangle in our pockets, how can we be anything but insulated? Every pain point, every hint of friction, is sanded and refined away until our entire existence is a glassy, smooth slide from one thing to the next.

There’s nothing wrong with comfort. Many of the things that contribute to our high standard of living is a gift from God. How thankful we should be for the scientific breakthroughs that have alleviated pointless suffering, the electricity that powers our economy, and soft skills that enable us to put food on the table. The age of comfort is not something to be despised, but to be accepted with gratitude. It was built on the hardships of those that came before us.

A struggle that anyone who has focused on their health will eventually encounter is moving from the period of transition to a period of maintenance. If you wake up significantly overweight, with just a few months of intense focus and lifestyle adjustment, you will meaningfully improve your health. But that time of transition is intense, and requires dedication that no one can sustain over a lifetime. Thankfully, once you attain your health goals, maintaining them does not require the same intensity, but it does require commitment. There is no body composition that will tolerate inactivity and ice cream every night. But making that switch, from intensity to intentionality, is where many of us fall off the track.

Our bodies are resilient and adaptable, and they will adjust in rapid succession if you change the parameters quickly enough. But rapid weight loss can result in rapid weight gain if things revert to the mean. The problem is not that we aren’t serious or committed, it’s that we’re using the wrong lens.

Health is a lifetime commitment, and requires long perspective over decades to achieving lasting positive outcomes. We can’t just avoid regular drinking for three or four months, but we have to change our relationship to alcohol. We can’t skip donuts after Mass for a season, but make them the exception, not the rule. When we take a long view, the urgency and hurry dissipate. I’m not skipping donuts just for today, I’m a person who eats foods based on their overall nutrition for my body. I’m not a person who walks when it’s nice outside, I’m a person who walks every day no matter what.

This correlates directly to the spiritual life. We can clean up our act in Lent, and maybe even kick an attachment to sin that we’ve fought for decades. But Lent is a season; holiness is the work of a lifetime. We need to be intense in Lent, we need to shift our focus and get intense, but it should be in service of a larger arc in our story. It should be the season that propels us to the next level, to a deeper love, to a more authentic vocation. The risk this Lent is not that you drink a soda or snack between meals; the risk is that you let the season pass without any real effort.

A long lens is required to achieve the results we want in our physical health and our spiritual health. Every day is an opportunity, but missing any one day won’t break us. We are the Easter people, and that means no matter what, we do the work.

Mother

Mon, 23 Feb 2026 16:27:59 -0400

The theological dynamism of the Holy Family is challenging to comprehend, but easier to grasp is the human dynamic. Jesus was raised by two saints, but Joseph and Mary were not saints while they put in the work. Mary was freed from the inclination to sin, but Joseph was not, and neither were exempted from the challenges of human existence. Relationships, economics, health, all of these factors weighed on them. They had to choose to overcome this crucible.

Mary’s place of reverence is well deserved, and meets the historical context. In ancient Israel, the queen was not the King’s wife, but rather his mother. After all, she was the woman who gifted the kingdom the King and thereby contributed significantly to its stability. That context aside, it would be odd for us to so properly venerate Christ the King and forget all about the people who raised and cared for Him.

Participation in the mystical body of Christ means that we accept Jesus’ parents as our own spiritual parents. Joseph was silent in Scripture and has made few apparitions since his death, while Mary has taken on a much more active role in Church history. In countries around the world, she has appeared, always careful to match the cultural conditions in which her presence is revealed. In local dialect and fashion, she brings messages of great importance. This is the act of a mother gently watching over her children.

Mary sees herself as mother to each of us, in a real and concrete way. This is not a room mom or a house mom, a relationship in a communal form; this is direct and personal connection to each of us. It is the desire of her heart to help us in any way she can, ensuring our safe return to Heaven to be with her Son. This is why the Memorare highlights the reliability of her intercession; a mother would never ignore the heartfelt wishes of her children.

She desires a deep, personal, and warm relationship grounded in real human love, that always points to God. It’s a relationship we should cultivate constantly.

Always Giving

Mon, 16 Feb 2026 07:00:00 -0400

Life as an adult is always busy and always full. It’s why when we return from vacation, we seem to find ourselves exhausted and in need of yet another vacation. Although we might get a quiet day, or weekend, or week, it never seems to be enough. That is because the idea that we will ever be calm and content alone is pure fiction.

The parent gives their energy for their children. The retiree gives their energy getting out of their house and seeking community. The single adult gives their energy preparing for what’s next. In every state and at every era, our energy is directed outward, where it should be.

There must be some degree of discipline and self-care. If we don’t do the little things, we will never have the strength to do the big things. But the desire for peace and calm is always rooted in the context of the family or community. I deeply enjoy the quiet day, weekend, or even week when my children are gone, the house is clean and calm, and my time is my own. When they are in the care of others, the subtle concern that is always alert for them is totally silent. But in those days, I also miss them. The thing that I thought I wanted, solitude, met one need but failed another.

I think the quiet, calm certainty we dream of is really an artifact of our childhood. In those days, others watched over us while we were clueless. We didn’t know how good it was to be protected, to be free to grow, learn, and experiment in the safety. We longed for the freedom and privilege of adulthood, not understanding what we asked for.

This is ordered disorder. Life is difficult and not as it was designed, but the challenges that we face and overcome do prepare us for our eventual return to Eden. The daily work of mending our every flaw is only possible with the time, space, and circumstances that life gives us. It’s why sainthood is always the goal; apart from Mary, no saint started perfect. But with the blessing of life, they had an encounter with God, and then sharpened themselves on the whetstone of human life.

The crown of sainthood is the objective, but what we then do with it brings the nature of our humanity full circle. We do not grasp it for ourselves, but cast it down in honor before the King.

Limitless

Mon, 09 Feb 2026 10:18:29 -0400

The days and years roll by, and now my third child, Lucy, is preparing to receive her First Reconciliation. She is excited and eager for the day, but what is most beautiful in the entire backdrop is how important this moment is for her. She is unlocking a deeply cathartic experience that will support and encourage her for the rest of her life.

The problem with faith is that it requires belief; but the truths that we hold are so deep, so complex, and so awesome that our minds resist. It very well may be that were we to fully comprehend and understand the fullness of even just this Sacrament, it would overcome us.

What is great about this is that God’s design does not require us to understand the full dynamism of the Sacraments; our knowledge has zero impact on the metaphysical reality.

This isn’t to say that we know nothing about it, or that it is performative because we’re clueless. It is to say that the limitations of our human intellect, for this moment, prevents us from gaining the total knowledge of what takes place. After all, we find it so difficult to forgive our neighbor for their sins against the HOA rule. But, in the Sacrament of Reconciliation, we experience an outpouring of God’s love and mercy so complete that it is able to overcome any sin that is brought to it. Whether it’s been a day, a week, or a lifetime wasted outside of God’s plan, it has the power to pardon.

After receiving this Sacrament, this week and at every other time in her life, Lucy will emerge as we all do, fully restored to relationship to God and in a similar state to the one she held at the moment of her Baptism. How powerful that would be if we fully surrendered to God’s love and fully internalized this truth. We all love a good comeback story; this is a fresh start in its fullest expression.

God’s truth is limitless, and we are drawn deeper into it the more we live in relationship with Him. The confessional is the wide open gate, always open to us, through which we pass from failure to victory. I hope Lucy will run through it every chance she gets.

Cadence

Mon, 02 Feb 2026 06:00:00 -0500

The paradox of time management is that the less structure there is to the day, the less that gets done. Corporate training programs like to use the rocks in a pitcher example. If you put the small rocks in, the pitcher overflows before the big rocks can be dropped in. However, if you put in the big rocks first, the small ones find little spaces throughout and the water remains contained. A framework to guide the cadence of our day can be helpful in ensuring we do the right things, and that we have situational awareness throughout the day.

The 75 Hard program is challenging not because it requires an extreme workout load, but because it puts real time demands on your day, every day. You not only have to find time to read and slam a gallon of water, you have to find time in the morning and evening for a 45-minute workout of some kind. The failure point is often when participants are overcome by events. The list is too long when piled on top of their already established one. In truth, the daily requirements are the framework that moves you through your day.

If you wake up with a list of eight nonnegotiable, you have to have a clear strategy, and timing, for when you’ll get them done. Some may not be singular events, like drinking a gallon of water, and those push you forward through the day. Time is a finite resource, so to fit it all in, you have to make choices. That means waking up when the alarm goes off, working when you’re on the clock, and avoiding the endless scrolling. It’s not actually overwhelm, it’s the guardrails that you operate within.

A list of things that you must do every day has a greater intent. The items that make it on the list correspond to some specific objective that you have. For me, a daily walk is on there. Walking helps me maintain my health, but I also just feel better throughout the day when I wake up and get it done. The same goes for prayer. These are the big rocks, the important things that give me more than the time they take. They’re worth doing.

There can be little difference between rest and idleness. Rest is to serve a purpose, to recover from something. Idleness is just not doing anything. Rest is earned when the important things are already accomplished; idleness steals the benefits we sought to obtain.

Momentum is huge in every application. With the right list of nonnegotiables and a cadence that keeps pushing you forward, success is inevitable.

Prayer as Ritual

Mon, 26 Jan 2026 06:00:00 -0500

Prayer is the most important thing we can do, and the thing we struggle with the most. Perhaps it’s related to just how open ended it is. Prayer is spontaneous thoughts from your heart, prayer is the Mass, and everything in between. If finding a good place for prayer in your life is a challenge, lean into ritual.

For me, coffee has a special place in my day. I have one cup after breakfast, and one early in the afternoon. I don’t think I need the caffeine, I am naturally a morning person. It certainly helps, but for me, coffee is not a thing or a moment; it’s an experience. My coffee in the morning is a special recipe that must be carefully constructed. It makes travel hard, so much so that I will now bring along the immersion blender that plays a central role. The afternoon is usually cold brew, slowly steeped over a day to pull out a specific flavor.

Drinking coffee, in my day, are two very specific points of time. In the morning, between my workout and starting the workday, and an afternoon pause. The ritual of stopping, following the recipe, and then savoring align perfectly with moments for prayer. This is when my brain slows down, when I am temporarily relieved from my duties and responsibilities, even just for a few minutes. It’s within the context of my coffee ritual that prayer dovetails.

Prayer is a ritual unto itself, and it shares many of the same characteristics of my daily coffee intake. They are moments, relational encounters with the God who made me. They are times for pause, where the weights of daily life can be set aside for calm. By connecting my daily coffee with my daily prayer, I make it easier to fit prayer into my life and enhance the moment.

Now I am no longer simply savoring layers of flavor, I’m connecting in relationship. I’m not just recharging my body, but refreshing my spirit. I I am not sitting on the couch in silence, but grounding myself in my core identity. Time well spent.

Finding time to pray or building a routine of prayer is always a challenge. Make it simpler by finding natural points in your day to connect to prayer. Ritual is a healthy and powerful thing; use it to your advantage.

In Their Proper Order

Mon, 19 Jan 2026 06:00:00 -0500

I think about systems a lot for work, so it’s comical when I find myself obliviously operating within my own broken one. It’s not right for any of us to think of ourselves as having any one single job. We exist at the nexus of many demands and responsibilities, often in acute conflict with one another. In the times when the pressure builds, and time runs short, we have to make executive decisions. Why is it that we always sequence our tasks incorrectly?

The truth is, it’s easier to cut my breakfast out of the schedule than it is to cancel the kids’. I have full autonomy to limit my work hours for the day, I have less running room when it comes to the school agenda. I can sacrifice my walking time in exchange for an hour more of sleep. But while I can do any or all of those things, I really shouldn’t.

Our energy is finite and needs to be managed, along with everything else. If I plan to make breakfast for the children and then my own, I risk exhausting my energy and schedule before it comes time to take care of myself. In the proper order, if I make my breakfast first, I’ll have the energy I need to make the children’s breakfast, and more. How I stumbled into getting that backwards remains a mystery to me.

Doing each thing in its proper order is about more than checking things off of a list. This is especially true if it’s a thinking-system, one that you designed with intention and purpose. I wake up early because it is true that it is the only block of time in my entire day that can be truly my own. But I also wake up early, and walk, because it gives me the energy and focus I need to carry through my day. I eat breakfast not because a commercial suggested it, but because food is the fuel that keeps my body engaged. The same goes for the other things on my list.

I would never neglect my tools the way that I have neglected my body. My body is the physical form that enables me to take care of my children, to serve my clients, and to accomplish the purpose for which I was made. Letting it grind down into inertia is a broken system underpinned by thin logic.

Doing things in the right way ensures that I am prepared, and capable, to manage the priorities and responsibilities of my day. It is a strong logic that ensures that when the moment arrives, I am ready.e

Digital Calm

Mon, 12 Jan 2026 06:00:00 -0500

Though it comes in cycles, we find ourselves again and again looking for a better relationship with our screens. The trouble is, they’re so useful and their makers would prefer us not to entertain such thoughts. We do need our time, attention and focus, but I think the deeper desire that we’re not fully expressing is that we want digital calm. We want the tools to support us throughout our day, but not distract us from the beauty of life.

There are many layers that describe why we feel this pull, but the simplest reason is the actual design of the software. Colors, density, and delight are all engaging, especially when we sense the connection between our favorite apps and the things they do for us. When seeking calm, perhaps seeking balance is the key. Treat your phone like the tool that it is and don’t just accept the default maximalist layout.

The home screen is the gateway trap, but it doesn’t have to be jam-packed with apps. Pick a serene background, limit yourself to 12 apps, and use the physical buttons to map to your most immediate needs. Deploy widgets to thoughtfully give you the information you need at a glance, without ever needing to open the app. Quickly search the app you need instead of scrolling through the long library list.

Dozens of strategies are out there, with varying degrees of hardness, but the through line is clear. Build for digital calm, and accept nothing else.

Some Noble Purpose

Mon, 05 Jan 2026 06:00:00 -0500

Earlier this week, I paused my workday to pray the Rosary. This is not a discipline that I’m consistent with, but I do think that it should be part of my daily routine. There is so much going on, taking a pause for fifteen minutes of calm meditation is a good antidote to the otherwise chaotic nature of my workday.

It was an ordinary work and school day, and frigid outside as winter ought to be. I settled onto the couch, facing the exterior window, and prayed on Hallow as a gentle snowfall could be seen through the window. It was a refreshing moment of peace, a connection to nature, to see the slowness and stillness of the entire scene.

On the other couches were my children, participating to varying degrees. This time is not for perfection, but encounter. That this rhythm of prayer, this island of peace in the middle of their day, is inscribed in their hearts. So even when they are older and out of the house, their heart will ache for these quiet moments.

As I considered all of this, the beauty of nature and the stillness of the children, I was reminded of my sense of purpose. Life is unpredictable and the future is totally unknowable. But I am here for a reason. God designed me into His plan for some noble purpose, if only I will offer my own fiat.

Believe

Mon, 29 Dec 2025 09:18:50 -0500

The heritage of our Catholic faith is deeply rooted in ancient peoples. From God’s first interaction with Abraham on the plains of Nineveh to today’s global Church, our history is collected in the stories, families, and prayers of billions of people throughout history.

A great struggle for the modernist mind is to accept truths that cannot be concretely verified. The Church has many treasures, relics, and traditions that add substance, character, and charism to its ministry. But in a digital age separated by thousands of years from the original events and primary sources, the question of belief is a stumbling block for many. How could all these things be true?

This doubt, when it extends beyond reasonable inquiry, is particularly rich given the context of our social media age. Fake news, state-actor misinformation, and AI hallucinations fuel tens of thousands of rumors and inaccuracies by the hour. Yet, we question unchanging messages that have been handed down for eighty-five generations across cultures and nations?

It’s important to remember that, as an institution, our history and the primary events of salvation history occurred in ancient times. Perhaps that is a blessing, as it was a cultural structure that was better prepared to adjudicate fact from fiction. Truth spread far and wide, like the four canonical Gospels through the early Christian communities, while the non-canonical Gospels and epistles fizzed out. Imagine Jesus had come for the first time in 2025, and how difficult it would be, with technology and bad actors, to sort out what was real and what was not.

These cultures, before mass literacy, were vitally dependent on accurate memorization of events and passing them on to generations. This treasury of history was central to the tribe and nation’s survival, and permitting the insertion of creative imaginings would have been deeply destructive. There were stories and fables in one category of oral storytelling, but historical events had to be jealously safeguarded.

There have no doubt been artistic liberties and embellishments added to certain events, like the ancillary details surrounding the birth of Jesus. Most of these are a sort of imaginative prayer, intended to add further narrative context and depth to the scant details two paragraphs in the Gospel give us. The important thing, however, is that these additions do not contradict the core truth, nor do they distract from the central mystery. Whether they actually happened or not, it does not really matter because the main tenets are not dependent on them.

Believing is a hard thing, but it’s also an act of trust. Test all things, as St. Paul instructed, but once they stand up to rigorous inquiry, hold fast and believe.

Stillness

Mon, 22 Dec 2025 05:57:17 -0500

For two days last week, all four children were away from home and at their grandparents’ house. The morning before they left, I rounded everyone up and we all cleaned the house. Tidied, dusted, and vacuumed, our home transformed into a fortress of quiet comfort. It was an order that is seldom seen in an active house. With everything done, I loaded them into the car and sent them off on their adventure.

Sometimes, especially on the busy days, I wonder what my life as an empty-nester will be like. Sure, quiet and cleanliness are two nice things to experience in stark contrast to the daily reality, but is that really a better phase than the one I’m in? Every age and every stage of life has its challenges, but it also holds treasures in its own ways. Small children are a handful, but they also fall asleep in your arms during Mass and express wonder at the tiniest of things. Middle schoolers are caught between their younger days and flexing their autonomy, but you can connect with them in new and mature ways. I’m confident that this phase will be enjoyable, and so will the next.

Stillness is the hallmark of the Christmas story. While many cultural interpretations and features have been added on over the years to the legend of Jesus’ birth, what hasn’t changed are the core elements. On a quiet night in the stillness of winter, the Creator of the Universe, our salvation, was born. In humble circumstances, there were miraculous events, but only experienced by a few people. This was a joyful moment to be marked and celebrated, but in a measured and calm way.

In a way, I think this sort of peace, a deeply refreshing and rejuvenating experience, is the promise of Heaven that we most forget about. When we do contemplate Heaven, it’s about the people or the activities. This makes sense, especially when we’re talking about a peace so foreign to us that our limited minds can’t stretch far enough to imagine a place of total calm. Like every theological truth, its grandeur is tucked away in simplicity and humility; it’s the kind of experience of being outside in the cold and darkness of a late December night and coming inside to the warmth of your home and the soft glow of your Christmas tree illuminating the room.

Jesus offers Himself as sacrifice at Easter and gift at Christmas. His arrival marks the pivot point in human history, when our story, stretching all the way back to Abraham, reaches its fulfillment. In the darkness of winter, search for that stillness, that small experience of peace that turns our minds and hearts toward the place He has prepared for us.

Simplify

Mon, 15 Dec 2025 06:00:00 -0500

It’s easy to accumulate clutter. A single dish on the counter soon has many friends; tasks partially finished attract more tasks. It doesn’t take long before you start to get the feeling that you’re overwhelmed and will never get caught up. It takes a declared reset, when you focus and get the clutter processed and completed, before you feel like you can breathe again.

Clutter comes with physical objects, but also in our digital and mental spaces. How good does it feel, in the day or two before vacation, when you clear the decks at work and get everything checked off the list? How amazing is it to come home from vacation to a clean house? It’s always a relief when that one project or task that’s been weighing on your mind gets crossed off and done.

Letting go of tasks, projects, and even physical objects is not only necessary, but cathartic. Interests change, priorities shift, and left in the wake of these things are hangers-on that we have to summon the courage to get rid of. Goals are set in the moment, but if they don’t align with what you really want or need, they’re just a waste of time and resources. Collections of things are meant to be curated; you don’t have to keep them forever.

Spring cleaning is a thing because when the weather changes and the newness of nature springs up around us, we want to turn over a new leaf, too. Things that we used to think we could never live without now bring us a sense of dread. They crowd out space for the items that spark joy.

Advent is an invitation to simplify everything; it’s a challenge to match our interior and exterior lives to the simple model of the Holy Family. It’s permission to let go of the things that we’ve wanted to be free from but can’t seem to get it done. Life is beautiful and hard, made only harder by complexity and clutter. Clean out your inbox, get that project done, curate your collections, sell or donate what’s no longer useful. Spend your time, attention, and resources on those things that are truly exciting and joyful, and let others experience the same thing with those items no longer doing the same for you.

Immaculate Conception

Mon, 08 Dec 2025 05:00:00 -0500

The Church holds that there is no further revelation after Christ. Christ is the fulfillment of revelation, closing the loop on everything, and tying together the myriad threads of theology woven in the history of Israel. While there is nothing new to be revealed, what has occurred over the centuries of Church history is a more in-depth understanding of what has already been shared. A reaffirming principle of theology is that simple ideas and words have a depth to them that unpacking them can take centuries.

No place is the more true than Mariology. Mary’s place of honor in the Church is a natural and logical outflow of her place in Jesus’ life. What man doesn’t love his mother? If Christ bears this love for His mother, shouldn’t the Church, His body, do the same? But understanding her uniqueness in human history, and the philosophical properties attributable to this status requires deep thought and clarification.

When you look at the list of Vatican-approved Marian apparitions, the circumstances of them is astounding. These approved apparitions were studied and scrutinized, and their effects observed before receiving the seal of approval. These sixteen or so apparitions have similar threads. From France and Belgium, to Japan, Ireland, Venezuela, Rwanda, and Mexico, Mary appears dressed in a culturally appropriate attire and speaks the language of the people. This is the style of a mother looking to connect with her child, not a regent arriving to condescend. Our understanding of her role as mother not just to Jesus, but to His Body, is furthered by this subtle communication.

The same is true for the theological dogma that is not just proclaimed, but solemnly celebrated today: the Immaculate Conception. Although Mary lived in the first century, it wasn’t until the 1854 that the Church proclaimed the dogma that Mary was conceived without original sin. That’s a long time to contemplate the idea, but it’s a conclusion that is not only logical, but imperative.

Original sin is the stain passed from parent to child that is at the root of our fallen nature, but its remedy is often obtained by those same parents: Baptism. Each time we receive the Eucharist, we bring the completeness of Christ within our physical selves. Though it lasts only a moment, that interaction changes us. How can we not be changed when imperfection comes into concrete contact with perfection? But when we receive the Eucharist, He only physically dwells in us for a few minutes before the digestive process is complete.

Christ’s human gestation was entirely normal, nine months in utero of growth and development. How could it be that perfection would physically dwell in imperfection for that long of a time? Further, how could Mary be prepared for the weight of her vocation if there was even the smallest idea of disobedience somewhere in her conscience? That is why the Immaculate Conception is so theologically significant, and necessary. At the moment Mary was created, she was spared the stain of sin. This was not to pigeonhole her into fiat, but so that if she chose to entrust herself fully to God, that when the magnificent and imposing presence of an archangel appeared to her, she would be totally free to respond.

The layers of Mariology are still being explored and unpacked, but today is a little reminder of just how incredible she is, and how lucky we are to call her Mom.

Prepare

Mon, 01 Dec 2025 06:00:00 -0500

Be Prepared is the motto that many of us memorized growing up, later turning into a marketing tagline of “Prepare. For Life.” Preparation is the prudent act of an adult, foreseeing some future event and taking positive steps to be ready for when they arrive. That is Advent, the changing of our physical environments and interior selves to be ready for the arrival of the foretold Savior.

Jesus’ arrival was not a surprise. For hundreds of years, the place of His arrival was told and retold in Israel. This promised Savior would be the fulfillment of all of God’s promises in the story, reaching back to Abraham in the desert of the Nineveh plains. Long waiting, long-suffering, Israel pined for this arrival and the new era that it would begin.

We enter the Christmas season each year with a sense of time compression and busyness. The Halloween-Thanksgiving-Christmas-New Year sequence in rapid succession seems to speed us up. All the things we hoped to accomplish in 2025 take on new urgency and, while most of those things will be pushed into 2026, we still try to get it all done.

This compression is the opposite of the intent of Thanksgiving and Christmas. These two holidays ask us, instead, to pause. In Thanksgiving, we partake in the national pastime of practicing gratitude. This is a uniquely American trait in our national DNA that acknowledges that our successes and blessings find their source in others and in God. It’s a day to reflect on how good our lives are, and though life is never easy, there is much to be grateful for.

Christmas marks the arrival of Christ, and the dawn of an era. Reaching its fulfillment at Easter when we are truly set free, His birth is a concrete event that tells us that it was all real. Every story, every poem, every song, it all pointed to this moment, to this event, and now it is happening.

There are many preparations ahead in the short four weeks before Christmas. We need to decorate our homes; a change in the physical space that we inhabit gives us frequent reminders of the importance of these days. We need to clean our conscience by going to Reconciliation so that we are ready to participate in the celebrations to the fullest without being attached to our failings. Finally, we should contemplate the depth and beauty of this mystery. The great I AM arrives in the form that we ourselves entered into this world, and with Him comes everything we’ve hoped for and everything that was promised.

It all was true, it is all real, and we are a part of it.

Yes, Kings

Mon, 24 Nov 2025 06:00:00 -0500

Human government has always been a tricky balance. Incentives are powerful forces in politics, religion, and markets; misalignment leads to wild instability. The kings we tend to remember were ruthless, self-indulgent, selfish individuals who wielded power for their benefit. They were the living embodiment of Lord Acton’s commentary, “absolute power corrupts absolutely.”

It would be wrong, historically and otherwise, to paint with such a broad brush. A centralized political leader who holds the vast majority of political and military power in a jurisdiction is inherently dangerous. A few good men in history performed admirably in the role, most failed miserably. Still, it’s easy to see that the Greek notion of the philosopher king would be an excellent fit, even in the modern world, were the role to be fulfilled faithfully.

The king is not meant to be a tyrant; just the opposite. The king is to have compassion for the health, safety, and welfare of his people. He is somewhat of a father figure, tending to the domestic and foreign affairs of the state so that his people can do the same for their families and communities. He should be thoughtful, deliberative, and, in the truest sense, humble. This great responsibility for so many placed on his shoulders will dictate the lives of many.

This is why it is so easy to ascribe kingship to Christ. Jesus is King of Kings, the leader of all dominions and principalities, and the true embodiment of kingly responsibility. He is focused and attentive to the needs of His people, provides what they need, and took upon Himself the sacrifice that they could never perform. This is a King.

Power dynamics and cultural pressures can distort in our minds our perception of relationships. Who wants to be a citizen when they can be a king? The truth is, kingship’s responsibility is a burden of strength and responsibility that few can manage. After all, who else but Christ could take upon Himself every sin of every person in every age? Being the beloved is a gift unto itself, and to belong to the King is a great blessing.

Kingship is not a problem, corruption is. How good is it to belong to the King whom corruption cannot touch.

End of Days

Mon, 17 Nov 2025 06:00:00 -0500

As the liturgical year winds down, the readings at the Sunday Mass focus on the end times, something called eschatology. The early Catholic Church believed that Jesus was coming back relatively immediately. All these years later, we’re still waiting. There are many times throughout the year that the liturgical flow reminds us of our pilgrimage on earth and its conclusion. It focuses our minds, and then we drift.

Imagination is one of our most powerful human creative functions. The ability to conjure and construct things in our mind, without seeing it in the physical world, is deeply beneficial. But with all of our distractions, once we are no longer children, it doesn’t get used as much.

The end times are not meant to be a scary event, but a hopeful fulfillment of all that God has promised. If we truly accept His love, and live within the bounds of the law, we should start each day with a sense of hope that today will finally be the day that all promises will be kept. After all, we were not made for earth, but for heaven.

We fear the end of our life, rightfully for the people we’ll leave behind and the things left undone. At that moment, we will have to truly let go of those we hold closest. Will our estates be a burden to our family? But we also fear it because we are not prepared. Death comes for us all, but catches most unaware.

Fulton Sheen, in his book Remade for Happiness, flips the script and reorients our attention. It is not just that we are hopeful for the return of Christ or our reunion with Him, but that in being prepared, we sneak up on death and catch it by surprise. He likened it to the homeowner who knew the thief was coming, laid in wait, and pounced.

It is challenging to choose the things of God rather than the things of man, and these weeks are a helpful cue for us of the importance of doing so. More than that, it’s a nudge to use our imagination to think about the depth, intricacy, and beauty of God’s promises, and live our life in alignment with those promises. What is more appealing: a sharp quip to take your coworker down a few notches, or a perpetual existence in a place of true peace where there are no tears?

The Church doesn’t exist as a stick to force into submission the unwilling, but the tender shepherds crook guiding us to the safety of our true home.

Guy Club

Mon, 10 Nov 2025 05:00:05 -0500

Benedict attended a Catholic summer camp this year, a transformative experience that I still see reflected in his life more than 90 days since it ended. Although it only happened once during his five days at camp, there was a group event called Guy Club, where the boys huddled separately from the girls. This was the opportunity to deliver specific, relevant ministry to the boys using methods that would resound with them. Perhaps my favorite outcome from this session was their tagline/chant, “Red meat, monster trucks, and power tools. You need an F-150!”

Every parent knows the genius of boys and girls, and how adapting parenting based on their particular needs can compound the results. Children need, most of all, attention and affection, but delivering life’s lessons in a boy-specific or girl-specific setting can make a big different.

Benedict is entering the critical stages of his human development, and these coming years will set the stage for his transition into a happy, stable, and productive adult. I want him to be prepared for the challenges ahead, but also to continue to be an interesting and delightful person. So I did what any good parent would do, and I stole the Guy Club idea.

With our LEGO room finally organized, I asked Benedict if he wanted to do Guy Club with me in the evenings after the girls go to bed: Bros, Bibles, & Bricks. We started last night, first listening to the Bible in a Year podcast, then building LEGO and talking about what we heard, and whatever else came into his mind. It was a productive time together, and he seemed eager to read along as Fr. Mike went through Genesis and Psalms.

Yesterday was only day one, and I know that there will be many challenges even over just the coming year to stay on track. I’ll be tired, he’ll be sick, there will be other more pressing things on my to-do list, but what better way to spend my time than investing in my son’s growth, and my relationship with him?

Faithful Departed

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 05:00:00 -0500

With All Saints Day, and All Souls Day behind us, we are entering into the end of the liturgical year. Soon the Sunday Gospel readings will focus on eschatology, the end times. It’s our annual confirmation, more specific than Lent and Advent, that this world is passing away.

There is a view that the Church uses evil as a stick, a means of scaring people into belief. This contradictory argument ignores many truths, all of which dovetail with our focus at the end of the year. We know that God is goodness and love itself, having no lack within Him. Does it not make sense, then, with our own knowledge of evil in the world, that there should be some single-point source that contains all evil? It would have to be so, because our understanding of Satan is that he exists with no connection to God; his existence is the complete absence of goodness and love. If there were any presence in the universe worthy of dread and fear, that sounds like a good candidate. But this is just one dimension where the stick argument falls down. What kind of love can be foisted upon an unwilling recipient? Love cannot impose itself; it’s a gift freely given that must meet an equally free acceptance. Evil is real, as we have all experienced, and though we have cause to fear it, it is not enough to run from evil. We must run to love.

With the celebration of All Saints Day, we raise our minds to the stories of those whom the Church has declared their holiness. These are men and women, children and the elderly, who have risen above their human frailties to embrace and live heroic virtue. They were cut down by the sword, died of every disease, or simply expired at the end of their lives; the common thread is that in life and in their death, they perfectly mirrored Christ’s love to the world.

All Souls Day is for the Faithful Departed. This is a special day of prayer for those who died knowing God, but the state of their souls is not known to us. It’s an opportunity for us to pray for them in hope that if they have not yet merited heaven, the grace of our prayer will bring them closer to their final goal.

Life has a way of quickly getting busy, and these regular check-ins are the Chruch’s gentle way of helping us stay focused. Prayer for the deceased should be a regular part of our prayer routine, and we should ever be mindful that Jesus is coming back. Are we prepared?

Genealogy

Mon, 27 Oct 2025 04:00:00 -0500

The Old Testament, in particular, contains several long and confusing lineages. Whether conducting a census of the nation of Israel, or establishing connections between figures, these long lists of difficult-to-pronounce names glaze over our eyes, but carry an important message.

Family genealogy tends to be the purview of one or two people in each family, but the difficult work of mapping out family connections is significant. It not only connects us with our past, but shows the long and winding road that brings us to where we stand. In the Bible, these genealogies are designed to establish authority. By showing that Abram comes from Noah’s ancient family, we can be confident in other details of his story. By tracing Jesus’ roots back to David, we see this kingly line finally fulfilled.

Reading these long lists of names, both known and unknown, may take a lot of time, but it’s not just about connecting Jesus and Abram to their forefathers. These genealogies are our genealogies; they’re how we are connected into the largest, most famous family in human history.

Though the work has not been done, it is possible, as with the apostolic succession of our bishops, to trace our family back to the earliest Christian communities. Making that connection is likely impossible, but were we able to do have historical records to complete the work, it would unlock a much deeper truth. With that connection established, we are truly plugged into God’s family, and our authority as priest, prophet, and king is very real.

The Bible is not just a collection of stories, and the Church is not just a written chapter in history. These are our stories and our history, how our family came to be, and how we can carry its mission forward.

I Will Serve

Mon, 20 Oct 2025 09:42:39 -0500

Our core identity is as children of God, in an intimate relationship with our Creator and bearing His image and likeness. When we reject, or choose to ignore, our identity, chaos steps in to fill the void. How much more lost can you be in the world than not even knowing who you are?

Our identity is also a paradox. The things that we naturally desire, for the most part, are the things that are injurious to us. I used to believe that animals were rational in that they could only act in their self-interest. My theory went out the window when our family dog ate a towel.

The Baltimore Catechism beautifully articulates the purpose of our lives: to know, love and serve God in this life, and to be happy with Him forever in the next. The first two parts of that proposition are easy to accept. The natural law confers a right to a child to know their parents, if God is our father, we ought to have knowledge of and be in relationship with Him. We do not exist in a vacuum; our identity exists within the context of the human family. We are relational beings, solitude is one of the gravest threats to our emotional and mental wellbeing.

Next, we are to love God. This, too, is easy to accept when considered in broader terms. The Creator of the universe, source of truth, king of kings, love itself offers us His love and invites us to accept the gift. The proposal is not derived from our merits or because of anything we’ve done, but because of who we are. Accepting and returning that love, as a child does for their parent, is also good and holy.

The third purpose, however, can be a stumbling block. As we know from Angelology, service was the purpose that made St. Michael the most powerful warrior and cast untold numbers of angels into Hell. This is no small principle.

The word, serve, carries with it a negative, but undeserved, negative connotation. It’s the right word to express this role, but a wrongful interpretation could equate it with enslavement. We are bound to God by the nature of our existence, but God’s nature does not allow Him to impose His love upon us. How can true love come only on the point of the sword? To serve God is not to have our free will stolen from us, but rather our willing donation of it to His greater purpose. Our lives and our actions are intended to be an extension of His saving work. Jesus told Peter to feed His sheep. This meant to bring the Gospel to a world starving to know who they were, but it also meant for me to make my kids breakfast. The corporal works of mercy are daily expressed within the family, even in the little things.

Service is a noble purpose that pulls us out of our orbit and obsession with the things that draw us inward and turns us into an extension of Love. There’s a reason people always feel better after some act of volunteerism, why we oddly feel better after an hour of picking up trash on the side of the road than we do after an hour of watching TV. We give of ourselves for the sake of others. When we serve, we become part of something greater.

The paradox of surrender, of service, is that we give up that which hurts us in exchange for that which heals. It is easy to know and to love God, the right and natural next step is to serve Him by serving those around us.

Given Up for You

Mon, 13 Oct 2025 07:37:46 -0500

The prayers of the Church are always with us. In our private and communal prayer, the words we pray find their origin in Scripture and tradition, echoing through our lives. It’s not uncommon for a word or phrase so familiar to us to strike us, at a particular time and place, in an entirely new way.

During the Eucharistic Prayer at every Mass, the formula that Jesus spoke at the first Mass is prayed by the priest. Before the host is elevated, after the Holy Spirit has been called down, the words are spoken: “This is My Body, given up for you.”

The Eucharist is offered for the whole Church and for all people throughout time and space, but the word that Jesus chose was “you.” It is a sacrifice given for all generally, yet at the same time given specifically for “you.”

God, the author of life and source of true love and joy, designed a plan of salvation centered on saving me; it was all done not for me as part of the general population, but for me as an individual. It was not done for who I am, but because of whose I am. His body was given up so that I might live.

In many ways, God is an enigma, a mystery of unimaginable depth and complexity. What mind can truly comprehend pure love? Yet in His magnificent intricacy, enough was revealed for me to know in my heart that I am His, that I am loved, and that my greatest end is to know, love, and serve Him. In the moments when I feel faint, I can always reach back to those words I hear every week: “This is My Body, given up for you.”

Re-form

Mon, 06 Oct 2025 09:56:35 -0500

The process of preparing a man for priestly ordination is more than just educational. It’s true that seminaries are themselves, or affiliated with, degree granting institutions that result in graduate degrees. But it’s not simply enough to do the book work and pass the tests. Priesthood is not the result of a credential; it’s the result of a radical transformation.

Priestly formation takes many years; there’s the establishment of a firm foundation of philosophy before building up theological knowledge. The men live in community, participating in regular and structured prayer. Although not as intensive as military training, the rigors of life as a seminarian have a similar strictness. Men are challenged to conform in such a way that they are prepared to stand in the place of Christ. It’s uncomfortable, hard, and arduous.

It’s sad that we’ve allowed our understanding of vocation to bifurcate. In a caste-like system, we separate priestly and religious life from the married life. The overwhelming majority of the Church is called to the married and single life. It mirrors the nation of Israel: only one of the twelve tribes, Levi, occupied a priestly role. The life of the Church is dependent on religious vocations, but it is equally dependent on sacramental marriages. It’s the type of symbiosis that we see in the family. Husband and wife offer different, but complimentary, gifts.

A consequence of the bifurcation is that we separate, too, the roles and responsibilities. We think it is the seminarians who must be radically re-formed and undergo the rigors of intensive formation. But the same is true for us. Every person is made in God’s image and likeness, and we are all made to reflect Him and His Love. We have inherited our fallen nature concurrent with our heritage as God’s sons and daughters. To become mirror images, we have to set down our desires and priorities that take us further from love and re-form ourselves into the perfection that we were intended to be.

Holiness is not the prerogative of the Saints, or reserved to those consecrated with the Chrism of Holy Orders. The correction to this misconception is coming into focus as the Church declares more and more of the laity saints. Individuals whose pictures we see, whose voices we hear, in whose lives we see ourselves. Sainthood is not an impossibility, even with the challenges we face, but rather our intended destination. To achieve it, however, we must humble ourselves to be reformed, and made into the creation God intended us to be.

Inspire

Mon, 29 Sep 2025 05:00:00 -0500

Life was never simple; it was never easy. Our parents, grandparents, and great parents endured generational struggles. The American revolution, the Civil War, the Great Depression, two global conflicts, social unrest, they endured it all. We live in dark times, but darkness and evil are two threads that have run through human history.

What’s different now, what makes this period so dangerous, is that we’re trying to white-knuckle our way through it without God. When brother fought against brother, public leaders regularly appealed to Heaven for help. When our grandfathers stormed the beaches of Normandy and raised the flag over Iwo Jima, they did so with a gun, rations, and a rosary in their kit. When John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King Jr. were gunned down, it happened in a nation that disagreed profoundly, but shared a common understanding of the divine.

Today, we don’t have that. The rectangles on our walls, in our rooms, on our desks, and in our pockets can connect us to the worst people, the worst ideas, and the deepest darkness. Without God, without prayer, without grace, how can we ever hope to overcome as our forefathers did?

At Mass this weekend, I looked around the pews. There were the elderly, parents with adult children, young families, and a shocking number of single adults. I normally sit towards the front with my children, so they are perhaps always there, just unseen behind me. What inspires is that these single adults live in a world that proclaims the uselessness of religion, and they chose different. Their parents didn’t tell them to go to Mass, their friends likely didn’t, they decided to be there.

We just celebrated the canonization of Pier Giorgio and Carlo Acutis, two saints who remind us that life is never to be taken for granted. We are not promised anything more than here and now, and we can choose sainthood.

Attack upon attack, violence upon violence, the cadence is increasing with frightening speed. But we do not have to go into this world without help or protection. God’s got our back, He already won and promised us a place in His victory. Never cower in fear; choose to be inspired.

Choice

Mon, 22 Sep 2025 07:10:55 -0500

Pain is a warning system of the body; it’s a signal to our brains that there’s a problem somewhere in the system. Although discomforting, it aims to protect us from worse outcomes by getting our attention — now. We can feel physical pain or emotional pain, but its objective is the same.

Sainthood is something that feels so far beyond us. We know the stories of the saints, and how easy it is to sin in our golden age of ease. How could our story ever compare to the heroic virtue of theirs? The truth is, the path of each saint is different, and it doesn’t require much effort to find someone in circumstances like us who reached that noble goal.

Our objective is not Purgatory, it’s Heaven. Purgatory is like when an outfielder jumps up on the wall and catches a ball before it flies out of the park. It’s the final opportunity for us to make good on our intention to love and serve God. No one said that it would be pleasant. In fact, everything that we’ve heard about Purgatory is unpleasant. It’s pain with hope, but pain nonetheless. An added grace to the reality of Purgatory is how the living and the saints can transfer grace through Christ across time and space for those poor souls in Purgatory.

We have concupiscence, our tendency to act against what we ought to do. That predisposition makes choosing sin easier, but it’s not a given. We entered into this world with a stain on us that was wiped away by our Baptism. The decisions we made brought it back. Our Christian life is hard, but if we are successful, we are promised the merits of Heaven.

We must be truly perfect to enter into God’s presence. The great gift of life is not that it is a test to which we already have the answers. It’s that we are provided the opportunity to say yes to Love within the relative comfort of our lives. We are surrounded by blessings and covered in grace.

Our options are to strive for holiness in this life today and enjoy the blessings throughout my lifetime, or undergo purification in the refinery of Purgatory. Maybe I should just try a little harder.