Don’t Bury Your Talent
I used to work for a non-profit. My job was to go into communities and start youth programs. The biggest obstacle I faced every time I tried to get a program started was getting the parents involved. It seemed like no matter where I was, urban, rural, affluent, poor, parents just didn’t want to volunteer. There were some very notable exceptions, but by and large, most parents that I met seemed pretty absentee.
We’re each given special gifts and talents that we’re supposed to use for the benefit of others. Our skills should be put to work improving the lives of our family and of our community. When we hold back, we rob everyone of the chance for a better life.
It’s critically important for your growth and health as a human person to give of your time. Don’t go overboard and give so much that you do it poorly, but give an appropriate amount. Our communities need volunteers. Our communities need leaders.
Instead of being the person hiding in the back trying to dodge helping out, get involved! No one likes people who only take. So coach a little league team, lead a youth group, or staff the local food bank.
We all have talents, big and small, that can be put to use improving the lives of others. Put yours in action starting today.
The Divine Office: What is it?
The Divine Office is the universal prayer of the Church. It’s also know as the Liturgy of the Hours or the Breviary. Ordained priests, deacons, and religious are required, to varying extents, to pray the Divine Office every day. There are five different times of prayers, also known as “Hours” during the day. Given the worldwide usage and differing timezones, the Liturgy of the Hours is literally being prayed at every moment of the day.
The Liturgy for the Hours is broken up into five different “Hours.” Ordained priests and religious pray all five hours, while permanent deacons are obligated to pray two of the hours each day. The hours are broken down into these parts: Office of Readings, Morning Prayer, Daytime Prayer, Evening Prayer, and Night Prayer. The time it takes to pray each “hour” is between 15-30 minutes, with the exception of Night Prayer which can take 10 minutes.
Each Hour is composed, generally speaking, of 3 psalms, a short reading, and a few other prayers. It’s a highly structured liturgical form of prayer which ensures that everyone praying the Divine Office is praying the exact same thing. In that way, the Liturgy of the Hours has the same beauty as the Mass in it’s universality.
The Liturgy of the Hours isn’t just for the clergy. It’s for all people of prayer. The awesome part about being so structured is that it provides a ready-made plan for daily prayer. It’s intense and requires commitment, but it’s utterly beautiful. The way in which the Hours are broken out enables us to be regularly and consistently praying throughout our day.
There are many ways to get started with the Liturgy of the Hours. I’d suggest that you start with just one “Hour” a day, and then grow from there. The full volume is 4 books, and it can cost up to $120. I’d recommend starting with the iBreviary app, which is free. If you’d like a slightly different version than the 4 volume set, “Christian Prayer” or “Shorter Christian Prayer” are good places to start. They’re the Liturgy of the Hours designed for the laity.
There’s a beauty in the structure of prayer. There’s a deeper sense of awe when considering the millions of other Catholics around the world who are praying with you each time you enter into this prayer.
3 Steps to Help You Reach Your Financial Goals
Setting goals is hard. Reaching financial ones is even more difficult. Money flows in and you instantly want to spend it. How do you balance the pursuit of your goals with the wants of today?
When you really want to buy something, it can be hard to tell yourself no, especially if you technically have the money. Budgets are great, but they only work if you stick to them. Budgets can change as needed, but if you’re constantly changing them every time you have have a whim, your budget really isn’t doing much for you.
There are 3 simple steps you can take to keep you in the driver’s seat. Impulses are just that, impulses. You’ll rationalize, you’ll explain, and you’ll feel like there’s no other option. Impulses are all emotion and emotion can get you off track in seconds. By implementing these three steps, you’ll be able to stay in control and properly process your impulses.
• Wait 30 days. If this is a real need, you won’t be able to wait 30 days. Most impulses are wants, so if you’ll wait 30 days, you can better determine how badly you really want that item. This is especially helpful because it’ll help you understand the “opportunity cost.” Opportunity cost means that if you buy A, then you can’t have B. In the end, you have to decide if you want A or B, and 30 days will help you make a better decision.
• Have a budget line to “catch money.” This was Alison’s idea, and it’s brilliant. Each month, you have categories that come in under budget, or extra money that shows up from other places. Instead of immediately giving it to a category, like Eating Out or Fun, create a new line item. Then, at your next budget committee meeting, allocate that money. You’ll make different decisions when you see a pile of money waiting, as opposed to spending it as it trickled in.
• Put reminders everywhere. Long term goals can be easy to forget. Put reminders of what you’re working towards, and more importantly, why you’re working towards it. These constant reminders will be helpful in keeping front and center why you’re sacrificing today.
Reaching financial goals is tough, but with these three simple steps, you can get more power for the fight.
What to Do When Your Want to Add Something New
Time is finite. Each day, we have just 24 hours to spend on our pursuits. Between 6 and 8 of those hours are dedicated to sleep, leaving us about 16 waking hours. How we spend that time directly impacts our lives and the lives of those around us.
As life progresses, there are always new activities that we want to take on. Our interests change and, while we decide to abandon some pursuits, we find new ones that interest us. Despite our changing desires, the one thing that doesn’t change is the amount of time that we have to allocate.
More likely than not, you’ll find yourself in a position where you’ll want to add something new without taking anything away. In those cases, what do you do?
The best thing to do is ask yourself the tough questions.
• Is this more important than something else?
• Is this worth waking up earlier?
• Is this worth going to bed later?
While it can be very easy to whitewash the answers, the most sure guide is to test the change. Make a decision about the changes that you’ll need to undergo and then give them a try.
The results of a test are a better guide than any series of questions. Tests give you actual answers that are completely truthful. Answers to questions can be swayed by bias.
Managing your schedule is a perpetual balance. By being proactive, you can strike the right one.
Priorities Matter
Our lives are full of priorities. Some things are simply more important than others. Making the right choices can drastically improve your quality of life.
We’re constantly prioritizing things. When we have a limited amount of time, we’ve got to do the most important things first. Of course, priorities can change as they need to.
When you’re scheduling your time or planning anything, there’s one question that you need to ask.
Are my choices adding value to my life and to that of my family?
It’s easy to become self-centered, especially with our time. But if we prioritize our days considering only our needs, we’re doing it wrong. Our prioritization demands that we weigh the needs of everyone in our lives. That way, we don’t spend our time in ways that are a detriment to our families.
Our time is not wholly our own, so it’s best to make sure that how we spend it reflects this reality.
Maximizing Your Time
How you spend your day is important. Each day there are gaps of time that could be put to better use. You already have a daily routine and it might be very loose or it might be very structured. Regardless, you have a series of activities that you complete each day in a given order. What happens when you want to add something new to that routine?
Alison and I recently bought a bread maker. As a part of that purchase, we decided it was time to rearrange the cabinets in our kitchen. Knowing that we had new demands on our cabinet space, combined with our desire to keep the counters as clear as possible, forced us into new ways of thinking. Having a new reality or a changed set of parameters can allow you to think in ways that you previously couldn’t. The same is true with your time.
From time to time, you’ll want to take up a new hobby or passion. It might be a construction project, daily reading, you might subscribe to a newspaper, or it may even be daily prayer. When this new time demand comes into your life, you’ll need to rethink your daily routine so that you can continue to accomplish everything else you’re already doing, assuming this new activity isn’t filling unclaimed time.
Changing your routine is hard to do. It requires lots of trial and error. You’ll be attempting to balance the demands of the new activity with your own preferences. For example, if you get a newspaper subscription, and you can’t read it in the morning because you’re not awake enough, then you’ll need to find time in the evening to read it. Any new activity should be put in a time slot that works for you. Put it in a place where you can maximize it.
Make small shifts to change the game. Big changes at any time are a bad idea and really just set you up for failure. So if you need more time in the morning, move your wakeup time by 15 minutes, not 2 hours. After 2 weeks, move it 15 minutes again. Gradual changes will produce the greatest result.
Another strategy is to consider shifting activities based on their demands. Ask yourself two questions; 1) What do I need to do alone? 2) What can I do with others? By dividing your activities in this way, you can understand how your schedule relates to those around you.
Your routine should be constantly evaluated to move with your schedule and to find better efficiencies. The more efficient you can be with your own schedule, the more time you can spend with your wife, family, and in relaxation mode.
Grow in Patience
Patience is a virtue that I’m not very good at.
Patience is a great virtue to have. It allows you to be kind to a customer service representative when you’re furious at a company. It can significantly reduce the number of fights with your wife. It can improve harmony in your relationships at work.
Unfortunately, the only way to really grow in patience is for it to be challenged. That means that you’ll have to undergo trial by fire.
You might also find that when you resolve to grow in patience that it will be especially tried. It will happen more often and with more intensity. That’s a difficult experience to undergo, even when you’re not trying to build your patience muscles.
It can be easier to endure when you know what will be waiting for you on the other side. Patience can make a huge difference in your relationships. When you are in a stressful time or difficult situation with someone and you’re able to exhibit patience, both of you will have a better outcome. Your patience will bring a calming presence to the situation and will ultimately be reciprocated by the other person.
Fights are caused by escalations. Patience is a de-escalator. It is incredibly difficult for someone to get increasingly angry with you when you’re remaining at a peaceful and calm level.
Growing in patience is really difficult. But the fruit that it produces is so sweet.
Your Ideal Day
“Begin with the end in mind” is excellent advice. If you’re able to visualize a project at its completion, you can better understand the steps you need to take to reach your goal. One of the best strategies for planning out your day is to follow this simple principle.
We have things that we’d like to accomplish during the day. We have activities that we love doing and others that must be done. We have things that will help us to relax, things that will support our family, and things that will keep our household running.
The perpetual enemy is roadblocks. The perpetual enemy is the couch. The perpetual enemy is the computer. These distractions can suck up valuable time when they’re taken out of order. The more time you spend watching TV, the less time you have to accomplish things on your to do list.
Having a plan can help. By planning out your day, to include rest and relaxation time, you can short-circuit distractions. When you’re busy washing the car or mowing the lawn, you’ll know that there’s a time scheduled during the day for you to watch TV. When you’re playing with your kids, you know that you’ve set aside time to read the paper or play a game.
Your plan needs to be balanced. It needs to have time for your family, for your faith, for fun, for intellectual growth, and for work. Whenever you neglect one of these areas, the others suffer. They’re all important in their own way, so dedicating time to them each day is important.
The day can easily slip away from you. By having a plan in place for how you’ll spend your time, you can by-pass distractions and get it done.
Primary Devotion
The Church is a wide and open road. While there are essential components of the spiritual life, such as the Sacraments, the Church provides limitless expressions of faith. One type of prayer is devotions.
A devotion is a type of prayer to a particular saint. It’s an ongoing form of prayer. Devotion isn’t worship, it’s another name for relationship. As you pray to a particular saint for intercession, you come to know them and their story. As a result, you both grow in friendship.
It can be tremendously helpful to have a primary devotion in your life. It’s all too easy to take on too many devotions. By having a primary devotion, you create a home base. When you get off track or wander off the path, you always know where to go to get started again.
Since you know where to start when you’re ready to start praying again, you’ll be comforted by the familiarity of the devotion.
Your primary devotion should be one that you love. It may be one that was important to your family or one that held significance at some point during your life.
There’s a principle in business that holds that companies should focus on doing one thing perfectly before adding additional services. For example, a car wash company should perfect their skills at car washing before adding detailing services. By honing your prayer skills in one particular way, you can perfect your prayer before exploring a different avenue of Catholicism.
A primary devotion can be just the tool you need to get back on the horse when you’ve fallen off.
Disbelief with Faith
As a part of the Catholic Church, we are members of an extraordinary community. We routinely have miracles happen within our group. We have relics that not only share our story, but also facilitate God’s grace. Sometimes, it’s almost too incredible for our minds to comprehend.
This blog, for me, is an exercise in both contemplation and humility. Part of the way that I process concepts is through writing. On many of the topics I write, I’m a novice. I write about the ideal, but am usually only experimenting at the beginners level. I’m sad to say that my initial reaction to hearing an incredible (and I daresay miraculous) story is disbelief. I’m a regular Doubting Thomas.
I have the most difficulty with events that relate to history. For example, in Italy is the childhood home of Mary. It was brought there in the fourth century. It’s hard for me to understand how it would at all be possible for anyone to have found such a home and then, above all else, transported it to Italy. Her house was nondescript, like any other in her town. How could they have possibly found the one?
A few weeks ago, on the Feast of the Exultation of the Cross, our pastor addressed my doubts in his homily. He had in his possession a relic of the True Cross. He rhetorically asked how it was possible that, after 300 years, St. Helen could have possibly found THE Cross. He then said something that was a game changer for me. “I have a harder time believing that God would have left the True Cross to be lost to history."
When I meet a miraculous story with disbelief, that is partly good sense. However, when I meet a miraculous story that has been duly verified by the Church, I’m suffering from a lack of faith. Why couldn’t God do those things? Why wouldn’t something amazing happen to the physical relics of men and women whom the Church has declared to be in Heaven?
When you start to take that stance on miracles, when you understand the strenuous vetting that the Church puts any miracle through, it starts to really sink in. This is an amazing faith. This is an amazing Church. How can you not feel a great zeal and love knowing that you’re part of a living body that has these experiences on a regular basis?
It’s human to meet extraordinary events and stories with doubt. Be sure enough in your faith to consider the fact that such stories might actually be true.