Torrents of Mercy
We have a sanitized view of Jesus’ crucifixion. Although we have visuals of it everywhere, the sheer brutality is almost too difficult to think about. Jesus’ torture and execution were not an academic exercise. It was an act of total love and surrender, a bold statement about the dignity of the human person and the sacredness of life that changed the course of human history.
There is no limiting principle to God’s mercy; that’s one reason it is so unfathomable. How can God forgive such grievous offenses? How can He continue to put up with our habitual sin, our failure to course correct, and our inability to live the truth of the Gospel and trust in His love?
It’s because of this that I love the image of Divine Mercy. In it, mercy flows from Christ’s body, but the word that we use, _torrents_ is so descriptive. It’s not a ripple, or a wave, it’s a strong, overwhelming, gushing flow that overcomes everything in its path.
Why is it necessary for this mercy to flow with such vigor? It’s because God understands us intimately; He lived as one of us. He knows the challenges that we face, and the courage required to live the life that He made us for. Think about just a few of the things we’re asked to do. As parents, we’re to care for and raise new life. We have to help our children navigate a broken world, to discover their moral compass, and to internalize the importance of a relationship with God.
We are tested, tempted, and tried in almost every moment of the day. God Himself knew this reality. That’s why, out of the depths of His love and through His own genius, He made this mercy available for us, if only we are to ask of it.
Building a strong habit of prayer is an excellent offense in overcoming our natural weaknesses, but perfection is just not possible. When we fail, we must pray for the humility to be completely inundated with the torrents of God’s mercy.
Constant Renewal
The great spiritual lesson of St. Francis was that the key to a healthy spiritual life is to have a mindset of constant renewal. We live in a fallen state, among a fallen world, and to enter into the presence of God, we must reclaim the perfection that He intended for us. That is no easy task, nor is it a one-and-done type of objective. It’s the work of a lifetime.
Impermanence is the nature of life; things are always in motion and changing. Embracing a mindset of constant renewal inspires a sense of exhaustion, but also one of hope. When we set out with a new goal, it’s all too easy to plan out every single step, become overwhelmed, and give up on the entire project. It’s also easy to become inspired and hopeful, no longer feeling trapped in your current reality.
Constant renewal is a principle that can help us in our daily decisions. When you wake up in the morning, and you know you should spend a few minutes in prayer, it can guide you into your prayer space. It can remind you of your goal, and lead you into the steps and habits that will get you there. It will give you the grace to fail, knowing that you won’t be defined by your past mistakes.
We seek comfort and stability in a world that’s continually changing. Victories once won can be frittered away by quitting the habits and discipline that got us there. The great paradox in all of this is that by submitting ourselves to discipline and diligence, we are truly free to live the lives that God intended for us.
Overrun
Temptation is a very personal thing. Each of us struggle with our blend of habitual sin. It’s not that we’re failures in the spiritual life, it’s that we all have our weaknesses. After weeks, months, and years of confessing the same things, it’s tempting to let ourselves be overrun.
Why keep fighting a losing battle? Why keep going through the same cycle, never with a different result? Why fight a battle for 80 years when it seems like we’ll never beat that sin?
The answer is found in our failings. The battle has already been fought, and won. The battle is not ours to fight, it is God’s. Why should we accept our reality as his children, and then resign ourselves to lesser things? We were made for greatness, and we were made to be loved.
The feeling of being overrun with sin is a tool of the devil. As CS Lewis masterfully illustrated in _The Screwtape Letters_, if we can be simply worn down to the point of giving up, then darkness wins. While we may feel overrun, we can never be made to give up. That’s a choice that we have to make ourselves.
For the first time in my life, I’ve successfully kept to a “Bible in a Year” reading plan. The Old Testament is shockingly graphic, full of the best and worst of humanity. The brilliance of it all is that the story of the people of Israel is our story. We are close to God, and at other times, we cast Him off. Despite it all, He remains faithful.
Never give up, never surrender; finish the race and win.
The Emperor Has No Clothes
Hypocrisy is part of what it means to be human. We’re deeply flawed. To have the expectation that we can live our lives with the rock solid integrity of Atticus Finch is unreasonable. The real problem is not when we find that we have erred, but when we refuse to admit the reality. No where does this play out more clearly, or more publicly, than in the political world.
Politicians sell narratives as a part of their bid to keep their jobs and maintain power. On both sides of the aisle, we see people making fools of themselves because they refuse to admit reality and course correct.
Denying reality only delays remedies. The longer we refuse to acknowledge the difficulty, the harder it is to fix. We enjoy the worlds of whimsy that we create because they fit our narrative and keep us warm at night. The real trouble comes when the wisps of fog dissipate and all that’s left is the cold, hard truth. The sooner we accept our growing waistline is becoming problematic, the sooner we can hit the gym and get back in shape.
The truth is, people respect those who admit their faults and make corrections. Silently, we all wish that we had the courage to do the same. Events can transpire outside our control, but if we refuse to pick up the mantle and get to work resolving our issues, they’ll only become bigger.
In the political world, and in our lives, we need to shine a bright light on our faults and take the steps that are necessary to live better, more authentic lives. Pretending to have clothes serves no purpose, especially when someone has the courage to point it out the fallacy.
Share Your Best Work
Sharing your work is a frightening thought. As I write many of these posts, thoughts creep up in my mind about how they will be received. Is this the best thing that I’ve ever written, or the worst? Will that post cause controversy? This is the essential dilemma that we face every day: can I be who I truly am, and will I be accepted for it?
Many of us will choose to do work outside the normal course of our career. It may be a total departure from the person who people perceive you to be. I found myself in that very position when I started writing. I spent my days working for a non-profit, and my early mornings writing at my desk. When I finished my first book, I was rather sheepish about it. I still am. Those same fears that I face when I sit down at my desk with my keyboard have been with me every time I’ve written something new over the past ten years.
Many years ago, I read the book “Show Your Work” by Auston Kleon. In it, I found a tremendous amount of inspiration and courage. I had the courage to write what I really wanted to write about and to be more transparent about my life. I summoned the courage to write on a broader scope of topics and to wade into issues of controversy. Not only that, but I had that experience because it’s whom I wanted to really be as a writer all along, but I didn’t believe in myself.
The truth of the matter is that you are your worst critic; it’s a double-edged sword. On the one hand, your critiques push you to work when you feel uninspired, and to chisel down your ideas, leaving only your very best. On the other, it can paralyze you. Fear can quickly overtake even the strongest in moments of weakness, leaving your work and your art all alone, with no one to enjoy it.
I’ve found that the best way to share my work is to create a lot of it, and then carefully pick out on the best. My mind is constantly in motion throughout the day as ideas come and go, but only the best stick, and only the best end up published. Each time I upload a new post, I feel a small sense of accomplishment; more art and beauty enters the world.
The internet is a wonderful thing, bringing down barriers to the marketplace. You have a talent, skill, or art that you need to share. Have the courage to show it to the world.
The Sexualization of Everything
I have to imagine that there was a time in human history when every human relationship wasn’t sexualized. No doubt, we’ve always had a certain fascination with sex, but not to the point where it must apply to everything. We’ve forgotten that love emits of degrees; rediscovering that simple truth could significantly improve all relationships.
We’ve so intertwined sex and love that the two are inseparable. There’s a basic flaw in that idea. Sex is absolute: it is, necessarily, a complete and total gift of self. It can be abused, perverted, or misused, but it’s integral in and of itself. Love, on the other hand, emits of various degrees. There’s the love of a parent, of a sibling, of a friend, of a neighbor, of a love interest, and of a spouse. Those different degrees have different features, privileges, and benefits. They’re love, but they’re all a different kind of love. The Greeks understood this concept and reflected it in their language. Sadly, the English language never carried it over.
When we consider both sex and love to be absolute, and the two are completely intertwined, we maim those human relationships that are not between spouses. Two friends of the same gender cannot be affectionate or express their love for each other because our societal conception states that relationship must also be sexual. As a result, there may not be a clarity or strength of bond between those friends for fear of being misconstrued.
The confusion doesn’t stop among friends. Uncommitted relationships suffer because there’s the expectation that the relationship must become sexual. Even if neither member of the relationship desires nor intends that end while in an uncommitted state, external influences will begin to inquire, assume, or pressure.
True human connection is authentic, emotional, and comes out of a deep desire for community. Our sexuality is an integral part of who we are, but it’s not a prerequisite for having a meaningful human relationship. Human sexuality is most properly suited for the married state. If we unwind the notion of sex and love being mutually exclusive, and if we recognize that love emits of degrees while sex does not, we can enjoy a new era of human relationships. Unbound by this foolish notion, people can be free to love each other appropriately, to express appropriate compassion and empathy, and ensure that all know that they are loved.
Sex is always love, but love is not always sex. This essential truth must be acknowledged if we wish to forge the depth of relationship that our ancestors once enjoyed.
Balance
I left the workforce in the fall of 2014 to stay home and take care of Benedict. Alison was just beginning her residency, and her monthly schedule change was not conducive to parenting and both parents working. Fast-forward eight years, I’m still an at-home dad, but now with four children and homeschooling two of them. I’m running my own business and busier than ever. Things are nearing a breaking point.
A strange thing happened last fall. My buddy called and asked if I’d be willing to help him professionally. I’ve spent my work time over the past several years writing and publishing, with the occasional web design client. I liked the idea of doing more administrative/operations activities, and thought it would be a good fit. A few months later, a friend from Church called me out of the blue and asked me to come in and start helping him. Shortly after that, another friend asked me to help with their publishing needs.
I love working, and running my own business. My days are stuffed with tasks, to-dos, school, and work, but I’m also feeling incredibly fulfilled. I see progress in my professional life and progress in my children, but as a result, my health has fallen by the wayside.
Balance is something that we all seek, but it’s as elusive as ever in our always-on world. Identify those must do things that leave you feeling complete at the end of the day, and make sure they get done every day. Then, fill in the spaces with your other responsibilities.
Plese Destroy
I took my son to Confession this weekend. He’s still pretty new to the Sacrament, so each time he goes, I print an Examination of Conscience for him to pray through.
He happily received the Sacrament, came back to our pew, and did his penance. I asked him if he was ready to go, but he replied that he needed a pen. I pulled one out of my pocket, handed it to him, and watched as he wrote on the outside of his carefully folded paper, “Plese Destroy.”
I assured him that we could shred it when we got home, but he insisted on first tearing it into pieces, right there in the pew, before we could leave. It was the perfect teachable moment. We talked about how what he was doing, destroying the paper that had his sins written on it, is precisely what just happened to him in Reconciliation. God tore up his sins, never to remember them.
Catholicism is deep, wide, and very complex. I love exploring theological ideas and theories, but often it’s the simplest things that connect us most closely to God’s heart.
A Single Spark
There’s a funny thing about inertia. It stands in our way and holds us back until the moment that it doesn’t. It’s all or nothing; it’s a concrete jersey barrier or completely nonexistent. A single spark in our life is all that it takes to vanish.
Back-to-school time is thought by some to be a second new year. We begin a new grade level, new family activities, and new routines as more children become active in different ways. It’s one of the many fresh starts on our calendars, a chance for us to try something new.
Many of us want to live better, more active lives. We would like to be engaged in our parishes, physically healthy, and growing intellectually, but inertia holds us back. It tells us that our plans are so big, it’s unknowable where we should start.
That’s the funny thing about inertia; it’s so hard to overcome, but is completely broken by a singular step. Once you’re on the other side, momentum builds, and you start to wonder why it was ever able to hold you back.
You just have to be brave enough to create that single spark to launch you into the next phase of your life.
Freedom Squandered
No other nation, in the history of civilization, has endured so long without the benefit of kings or authoritarians. The United States has achieved a long-running democracy, in which the principles of liberty and civic responsibility drive us to our collective forward progress as a nation. What are we doing with this freedom?
To be frank, we’re blowing it. Our forefathers did the hard work cobbling together a nation of immigrants, standing up to the British Empire, resolving a civil war, winning two global wars, and setting a course to prosperity. For Americans alive today, we’ve received the gift of a stable, peaceful democracy without having to fight for it.
This is a grave danger, and it has all the hallmarks of historical collapses of civilizations. We become complacent and more concerned about perfection than about preserving domestic tranquility. We club our political and intellectual opponents, assuming the worst in each other and ignoring facts.
It’s a matter of physics that an object at rest tends to stay at rest. We are tending towards that sense of self-satisfaction that will be our undoing. It’s like we read in the Gospel, how the man rids himself of a demon, but doesn’t fill that space with anything good or new. So, when the demon comes back with his friends, he finds a space to inhabit.
Freedom is not free, and even now, there are Americans standing guard around the world, separated from their friends and family, maintaining our peace and security. This is a flawed, but great nation, an experiment worth defending. A house divided against itself cannot stand. Let’s stop using our freedom to attack each other, and instead use it to build a better nation.