Catholic Husband

Love / Lead / Serve

Can She Really Always Be Right

I am not a prideful man. Whenever I must observe myself or a behavior, if the answer is that I am in the right, I instantly question that judgement. I want to make sure that my judgement calls do not cause me appear foolish.

One of the biggest concepts that I struggle with is, “Your wife is always right.” I make plenty of mistakes, I recognize that. Yet, such an absolute statement must have a flaw somewhere. After all, if the wife is always right, what value does the husband bring to the table?

As men, we face a crisis in Society. We are at the butt of jokes in movies and sitcoms. The father is an idiot and the mother and children are always wise. This is not who we are called to be! We are called to be the hero of our family. We aren’t the court jester, we are the head of the household, charged with the care and protection of those under our roof.

How do we reconcile this saying over what our role truly is? I think that we should first understand that the statement should not be seen as an absolute. Again, if the husband is always wrong, what value does he bring to the relationship? We have let this one run a little too far.

The heart of the phrase, “The wife is always right” is actually hidden just behind the words. I believe the real meaning is that husbands should defer to their wives, except in situations where they are clearly acting contrary to faith or morals.

I think it is more an act of love to defer to your wife, when appropriate. We have allowed the phrase to be hijacked and turned into a bully pulpit, as opposed to what it actually is. It is an opportunity to show deference to the cradle of life. As husbands, we are called to love our wives as Christ loved the Church. (Eph 5:25) Absolute. Unquestioning. Always working in Her best interest, even when it is not always convenient for her.

Men, we need to grow a backbone. We need to take our pride down a notch (or three). We need to love our wives heroically daily. Don’t roll over like a possum, fight for your wife and for your marriage as St. Joseph fought for his!